Failure and Success

I gained 4 pounds over Christmas. Failure.

I lost 4 pounds from 36 hours of throwing up and diarrhea associated with a nasty case of food poisoning. Success.

Current Weight: 196 lbs.

New Plan for the Next 10 Days

Following much thought and careful consideration, I have decided to revamp my goal for the next ten days. No I am not abandoning my smarter choices, just trying to create a plan that will allow me to not focus so much on all of the things I cannot have (which I am currently obsessing on all day, everyday).

I will still make my healthy squash casserole and roasted sweet potatoes for Christmas Eve, in lieu of mashed potatoes with gravy and green bean casserole covered in fried onions. I'm just saying I may partake in a piece of fudge, or even enjoy a Christmas cookie. The cheese platter and chex mix will not be seen as my enemy. Jeff and I can take goodies to Dan and Jenny's on New Year's Eve without me focusing on the fact I can't eat any of them. I can have a few cocktails and not worry all night about how many calories a cosmopolitan has in it.

My new goal for the next ten days will not be to lose weight, but to maintain where I am at; 196 pounds. This may not be the smartest thing, but it is necessary for me to maintain what little sanity I have left.

They say you need to change your thinking from "gatherings = food" to "gatherings = friends". For the past few weeks I haven't been able to stop thinking "gatherings = no food". My focus didn't naturally switch to the friends part, all I could think about was how much food was going to be there, and what could I eat, and what couldn't I eat, and I better not eat all day before I go, etc. It has made a serious impact on my spirit. A negative one.

Maybe this new plan can change that.

Come Out Slowly With Your Hands in the Air...

I've been surrounded by cookie, fudge, chocolate covered pretzel, truffle, and homemade candy trays.

Holidays suck.

Ok, not really. But my banana would be better if it were frozen and covered in chocolate and peanuts.

Sunday Evening Post: Week Six

While my posting may seem positive becasue I can post a loss for the week, I am feeling like a bit of a failure due to some choices I made over the weekend.

Current Weight: 197 (3 lbs. lost)

I have successfully reached my first goal of anything that begins with a "1". My new goal will be 175 by my 33rd birthday in mid-February. This should allow me to wear a size 16, something I haven't seen since my wedding 12+ years ago.

What am I feeling a failure for? I had nachos for dinner at friends Saturday night. I did bring baked chips (only 1gm of fat per serving) and lowfat sour cream. But I also had nacho cheese, refried beans, chili and hamburger on them. And, I had one of Sean's molasses cookies. It rocked. Then on Sunday after a healthy, but plentiful, dinner at my parents house I commited the ultimate cheat. It was a very small piece, but never the less it was a piece of french apple pie with about 1/2 cup of vanilla ice cream.

I tried to make myself feel better by noting that beside the nachos and cookie on Saturday, all I had (all day) was 1 packed of weight control instant oatmeal and water. Sunday I popped in some pre-packaged meal with 210 calories and 4gms of fat but only ate half of it, as it was very gross. Besides that...water.

I know. Not good.

I need to get back on my several, well-portioned, healthy meals throughout the day habit. Going places where I know the choices will not be in my best interest, I tell myself to not eat all day so I can take part in the festivities (= food). I have to stop equating the festivities with the food if I am ever going to make it through the next two weeks.

Pretty Mundane...

I have nothing great to share regarding my new and improved eating habits. They are really starting to become just that. Habits. Saying no is second nature. Thoughts of splurges are fewer and farther between. My pants look ridiculous, but I kinda like it. It reminds me how far I have come.

Speaking of pants, I owe a shopping story.

This past weekend my department's holiday party was held at the boss's house. I wanted to get some nice, dark, straight leg jeans and a top. All of the jeans I am wearing now are a size 22 and hang so far down the bottoms drag in the wet snow. Annoying. Good news and bad news shopping. Good = size 20 are too big. Bad = size 18 are too tight. I can get the 18's on and buttoned but they feel tight and I don't want that to discourage me. I am done wearing pants that hurt. 10 more pounds though, and they're mine.

I call my Jeffrey to tell him my news. His response? "Buy 19's." Typical man.

Also, I was able to buy a top in the Old Navy misses department. It's a size XXL, but two months ago that wasn't big enough. Back then I would only get to choose from the slim pickins' in the "Plus Size" area. Watch out misses, here I come!

Weekend Update: Week Five

Sorry to be posting so late. I have been in bed, sick for two days.

Current Weight (as of Sunday): 200 lbs.

Seven down since last Sunday, thirty total. One more pound to my first goal.

I have a great story about buying new pants this weekend, but unfortunatley I will have to post it later. Duty calls.

Smoothies

I've discovered fat free smoothies in the Java City Cafe in our newly renovated lobby. Thankfully, I have a coworker that likes to split them with me. Half a smoothie is perfect, and better on my pocketbook. They're a whopping $4.15 each.

I'm starting to miss cookies. And hamburgers. And pizza.

But I'm really liking my scale these days. Three more pounds to my first goal. Then I get to set a new one.

Save the Hoo-Hoo's

I visited Schweaty Man, who is recoving from surgery, in his hospital room today. He asks how my pics went this weekend, and I pulled a printout from my back pocket. My newly discovered vanity has no bounds - I carry this printout with me everywhere.

After gazing at the before and current shots for what seems to be a really long time, his comment is, "Be careful. You don't want to lose your hoo-hoo's".

I think we'll chalk this one up to the use of his PCA every six minutes (Patient Controlled Anestheisia). Morphine apparently affects the filter between your brain and your mouth. I'm going to LOVE teasing him about this one when he gets back.

Can't Stop Looking...

Okay, I'll admit it. I do not consider myself a vain person, but I cannot stop looking at my before and current pics. I say current, because "after" to me implies an end and I'm just beginning baby!

To get the full impact you really have to look at them side by side so I have put them together for you. I will take all woo-hoo's you have to offer as I am feeling awesome and more motivated than ever to continue.

Sunday Evening Post: Week Four

So here it is:

Current Weight: 207 lbs (down 23 total)
Neck: 15" (down 1.5")
Bust: 45.5" (down 1")
Arms: 28.5" (down 4")
Waist: 40.5" (down 3")
Gut: 51.75" (down 2.25")
Thighs: 55" (down 3")

From what I hear, my pics show some loss too:

Breaking News.

Jennifer was just able to pull down her trousers in the bathroom without, I repeat WITHOUT, unfastening them.

Call CNN, FoxNews, MSNBC...if this isn't ticker worthy, I don't know what is.